Taking Risks in Sex Not Always Bad

“What do you say to taking chances?” This line from a song in the first Glee soundtrack has been looping in my brain, so when one of my favourite sexual health writers emphasized the need to take chances for better sex, my immediate response was yes! 

Celebrate spring by doing something new, suggests Dr. Debby. She’s not saying to take risks that could make you or your partner vulnerable to swapping STIs, but risks that could make you feel stronger in your relationship and your own desire.

We talk about risks in sex as negative- risks of infection, risks of pregnancy. But risk can also be good and empowering. Risk can take your senses to a new plane, your relationship to a new level. Dr Debby’s not dissing “vanilla sex” by any means (and here’s some praise for it too). She’s talking about taking risks to connect with your partner.

Why risk? Because of the moment. I found myself nodding as I read Formerly Hot’s Stephanie Dolgoff’s post to twenty somethings the other day, particularly the part where she rejects the notion of calling the forties middle age. We don’t really know how long we have, she writes, so what if this isn’t the middle? It’s so true. We can all cite a premature death, whether it’s from cancer, or HIV, or something more sudden and unexpected. It happens. Though we hope the reality is that we’re in midlife, it may not be the case. So carpe diem, as they say.

The notion of cherishing the present moment can be translated into everything, including our sex lives. What do you want now? What kind of risk would delight, set you off your usual? Why not go for it?

- Janet

Check this Out: Risks and Routine with your long time guy or gal: One Woman’s Take on "The One"

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